The Talk pt. 2...The Break Up

Okay.
Sorry for the disappearance act that I've pulled away from the blog. I mean it was the holidays and all, right?...whatever to you too.

Back in October I posted "The Talk" which was about the conversation that two people have to get into a relationship. The post was a fairly interesting one and got some great feedback. What surprised me was the amount of people that asked me to do a follow up of the opposite conversation...the talk that leads to break ups.

Unfortunately, I know a thing or two...or four about break ups and the conversations that ultimately end relationships. But there is never any cool or normal way to have that conversation, is there? Sure there is. For me, I never see any reason to give a damn about HOW to end the relationship verbally. Especially, when realistically it's already over. Here are some of my more interesting break up conversations. (ironically, they are all via phone lol)

Situation: My girl and I had been together for a few months and at the time I was working on my 1st project "Hard Pills". It was a mixtape that was pretty dark and personal. Needless to say I wasn't the most pleasant and easiest person to deal with at that time. I explained to my girl that I would be done with the project in two months and asked her to give me that much time to finish it and I promised her that I would be back to normal. At first she agreed, then 2 weeks later..................

Sonny: What's Wrong?
GirlFriend: I don't know. I don't think that I am as happy as I used to be.
Sonny: Is it because of me?
GF: Yeah. I just don't think I can wait for you to be finished. I'm just not happy and I don't know what to do.
Sonny: ..............*silence*................
GF: Hello?
Sonny: Umm...ok.
GF: ..............*silence*................
Sonny: Do you want me to help you with this?
GF: I guess.....
Sonny: How about we break up and try it again when you're happy?
GF: Uhhhh...O....K

*Sonny hangs up the phone*


Situation: Though I was young and still in college at the time, my relationship felt very real and was on the path to becoming serious.......until I came back from vacation to find out my girlfriend moved into another apartment (with a "friend from high school"....#CmonSon #GetTheFuckOuttaHereWitThatBullshit..........www.twitter.com/sonny_vega lol).
So obviously things changed since i took my ass on vacation. This was probably the 3rd or 4th conversation that we had since I returned home...

GF: I feel like you're not trying to move forward and take that next step with me.
Sonny: I mean, I'm just trying to get done with school. I want to be with you but the time for the next step isn't today.
GF: Well, I want to get married, settle down, and have a family.
Sonny: So what are you saying?
GF: Give me a ring, or I'm leaving!
Sonny: ..........*silence*...........
GF: Hello?
Sonny: I will bring your stuff to your job on Monday. We're done.

*Sonny hangs up the phone*

Situation: My girl and I broke up a few months prior to the following conversation. The next conversation is basically about how she saw pictures of me on Facebook and decided that because I was hugging 3 girls dressed as naughty school girls...that I was fucking all 3 of them (I only slept with one of the girls...but I'd like to think that all 3 girls were a possibility...anyway). The worst part about all of this childish shit is that I was single at the time those pictures were taken. So she started a fight about those pictures (and others) and the fact that I didn't have any pictures of us on Facebook.

**Side Note: at that time I was like a vault with my personal life when it came to facebook...and she was something personal to me. I treated facebook as strictly a social site, and the pictures that she saw were social pictures.

and now, the conversation...

Sonny: The girls are only friends to me, and I was single when we took those pics.
GF: Fuck that. You are trying to make it seem like you are some big player or something. You think that I want to see 3 bitches draped over you?
Sonny: No. But I since you are the reason I was single at that time...I don't think you get to tell me what to do about that time period in my life.

**Side Note: Some people bring out the worst in you. You know, they are the ones that will MAKE you tell them something to hurt their feelings. She was that person...although I never really believed that she had feelings at all. Let's just say that if Satan had a mother....she would worship this broad.

GF: So! I know you are fucking other bitches, Sonny. That's why you never put pictures of us up.
Sonny: What pictures? We don't have any, duh.
GF: Either take those pictures down or its over.
Sonny: Are you giving me an ultimatum?...over Facebook?...are you serious?
GF: Yes. I'm not playing with you.
Sonny: Well consider yourself single. I'm finished. I quit. And I'm going back to work.

*Sonny hangs up the phone*

I hear from people all of the time that they don't know how to have that conversation with their boyfriend / girlfriend to break up with them. For me, it's always been a piece of cake. It's not that I don't care about that person, but if I get to the point of breaking up...why have a discussion? I mean really, what fan watches the post game interview when their favorite team lost the game??? That's just adding insult to injury.

So maybe I should start a "break up messenger service" to do the dirty work for those people who find it too hard to tell their mate to KICK ROCKS!

Shout Out to every girl that I ever broke up with...you dolls are awesome...well except for one...but whatever. lol